Every Italian family has one. She is the Matriarch of the clan. She is all seeing, all knowing so there's no point in believing you actually have a say in living your life the way you want to. If you actually have nerve to rebel against her decision, you will be sentenced to a lifetime of guilt. Its a punishment worse than death. The Macaroni Queen in our family ruled our us with the wooden spoon she used to make gravy ( spaghetti sauce). It was her scepter and it was used to emphasize her authority. When there were actions that threatens her Rule, she'd wave the spoon like a sword and exclaim " Its just shit for the birds!". It meant the accused would receive The Capitol punishment. The Macaroni Queen's reign is life long. A successor is crowned (there really is a crown! Its made with ziti noodles, elbow macaroni, bow tie pasta and spray painted gold) and assume the position as Ruler of the family. However, there are complications rarely seen in what should be a smooth transition: There are three successors to the throne--The Queen's daughter, grandchild and my mother. And you thought England's Royal Family had problems! At least we have ravioli!
Obviously, this is an exaggeration of my family. We have a kind of bond that keeps us together, regardless of the miles that may separate us. Get all of us under one roof and lovely chaos will ensue. There will always be a mouth-watering feast, wine flowing and drama that we thrive on. We put "fun" in dysfunctional. I can't think of a more perfect way to spend together, and who would want to?
The Macaroni Queen title may never be decided. It doesn't matter. We'll always continue to celebrate everything that makes us exceptional. And I call dibs on the cannoli!
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